I love how songs hold memories.
This one CD I’m listening to now is full of early, early college. And because those memories have lasted this long, I feel pretty confident that they will always continue to be that way.
I bought Jack’s Mannequin’s The Glass Passenger as soon as it was released. I remember it rather distinctly: it was a Tuesday morning in late September 2008, and I woke up early for class just to download the album. It was bright outside; I was so excited to buy it. I walked to my 9am Calculus 1 with my headphones in, giving it the first listen. I’d already heard a couple of the songs on there – “The Resolution” and “Bloodshot” had been previously released – but the rest of them – there was such a wonder. One that cannot adequately be described. During the rest of the quarter, I listened to it over and over and over again. I couldn’t walk home from my welding lab (which went til 9pm once a week) without hearing it. I listened to it the night President Obama got elected.
I knew this CD before I knew Davis. Every line means something to me. Each song links to something – baking cookies in my kitchen, walking through one particular parking lot, my very first apartment. It reeks of autumn and youth and discovery and wonder. Later I got to see them perform most of the songs live when Davis took me to their concert in April 2009. I have their t-shirt, and I still love the sweatshirt that I got from their concert (despite its Sharpie marks and rattiness).
I love a lot of CDs. Viva La Vida and Mylo Xyloto by Coldplay, Fractions by Decoder Ring, Sigh No More by Mumford and Sons, even Jack’s Mannequin’s previous album Everything in Transit. But no CD hits me as hard as this one does.
Andrew McMahon (the lead singer of Jack’s Mannequin) recently decided to do his own thing and start a solo project. So one of my favorite bands is no more. But I have to say, his new stuff is good. I’m really grateful that I have this gem, this glass passenger to keep me company for life and remind me of the early days of college.
I know some pretty awesome people.
And the thing is, I want to hang out with them all. I want to really get to know them outside of class and work and just become friends. But I feel so constrained by things we constantly have to do, and by the time I actually cross off the last item on my To Do list, I’m wiped and just want to sleep or space out and not do anything anymore. And on top of that, I feel awkward trying to be friends with someone if I don’t have a “reason” to go see them. It’s tough for me to be like, “Hey, I like you. We should just hang out and have awesome conversations together.” Why can’t I be like a preschooler who has no problem playing with any- and everyone?
So, to Ariana and Emily and Megan and Connor and Jasper, to all of you and to everyone else, if you’re reading this: let’s freaking do something together. Let’s sit around and talk about our feelings and how freaking amazing life is. Let’s make the most of the next four weeks, because it’ll just get harder once they’re gone. I like you all, but I’m shy sometimes. I’m going to make a conscious effort to spend time with you in the near future. Let’s do it.
In other random news, I just bought a “I Will Fight” bracelet (like the one Andrew McMahon from Jack’s Mannequin and Something Corporate wears!). I don’t know if I can properly express my excitement about this. Let me explain just a little bit: a long time ago, back in 2005 I believe, when the rubber bracelet was the coolest thing ever, before I even *gasp* knew who Jack’s Mannequin was, Andrew McMahon and AbsolutePunk.net sold these bracelets to raise money for leukemia and lymphoma research. The quote is from the song “Watch the Sky” and refers to McMahon’s personal struggle with leukemia. I most certainly missed this boat and thus didn’t get a bracelet and after the fact I wanted one really really badly. Well, I just found out that they started making them again to sell them for the same organization, so I immediately and without any hesitation signed up for eBay and ordered one! Yes! It should be here in a few days. I don’t know if I’ve ever been so excited about a piece of rubber before.
Ah, life. You are so good. There is so much here that I have yet to explore. Thanks for being so freaking awesome. I can’t wait to learn more about you and to just live.
NEW INFORMATION: NEW JACK’S MANNEQUIN CD COMING OUT THIS SUMMER. WORLD, YOU ARE AMAZING!